Oh. My. Lord.

The only reason I'm rewatching Edge of Tomorrow just a few hours after my first viewing is Emily Blunt.

Because I can't forget Emily Blunt doing the chaturanga pose in the movie.

Because I can watch her chaturanga on loop.

And ... WISH GRANTED. (Hell yeah. Thank you so much, Internet!)

And wide-screen available here!

Actually Emily Blunt doing what she's doing has her own auto-complete and various similar suggestions in Google; I guess there must've been many a gay girl busy searching for the same thing when the movie first came out. We sure love them sexy toned/muscular arms.

I can't believe she was pregnant when she was shooting this movie. On the Graham Norton show interview, I remember her (and Cruise) saying how heavy and warm the suits were, so, kudos.

Also:

Swooning ... swooning ... swooned.

And This Is Why ...

I absolutely ADORE Nargis Fakhri:

Quite frankly, that movie was on the meh side of just okay only, but outside of that movie (and any movie), Nargis is hilarious and adorable. "Ow, my vagina!" indeed!

That last bit when Arunoday Singh asked if she had just wiped her boogers on him and she just nodded (LOL!) — aww, she's just too precious!

And this other clip:

Arunoday is absolutely right. Nobody will even want to win an argument with that cute pout.

SHO SHO SHO CUTE <3<3<3!

(Nargis seems to share better chemistry with Arunoday than with Varun Dhawan. So how about casting opposite each other in a less stupid rom-com soon, eh?)

Weekend

When I was at Mustafa's on Friday, I'd bought Daawat-e-Ishq, Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster Returns, and I Am.

I'd intended to buy and watch Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster before getting its sequel but for so many months now couldn't find a copy at Mustafa's. I've been waiting and waiting but kept getting told, "Out of stock!" I'm tired of waiting; more importantly, I think I'm in a crime movie phase.

Unfortunately, the Universe isn't cooperating nor having any of that. No Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster, no A Wednesday!.

I'm not fond of the Godfather-type sagas, but maybe I should watch the epic of the Gangs of Wasseypur. Thing is, I also want happy endings in crime stories. Is that too much to ask?

Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster Returns I like a lot!

Oh. My. Lord. Mahie Gill. Apparently, I have a hitherto unknown attraction to not only sad women, but also slightly unhinged ones. She played the titular biwi so awesomely. Why haven't I seen her in more movies? (According to her filmography in Wikipedia, she was in an item number in Mirch, which I watched but had — as I am wont — ignored the item number. WTF was she doing in the shitty Dabanggs?!)

I'm building up to a desperation level almost equal to the time I was looking for Delhi Belly. Hope I won't have to head back to the overpriced shop for Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster ...

Also hoping for Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster to be at the very least a trilogy — the third one with Vijay Raaz and/or Nawazuddin Siddiqui. I mean, I believe Ranjhana's love for Aditya is true so I'm dying to find out how the ostensible love triangle will resolve.

But I won't lie: during the 'Idhar Gire' song, Madhavi and Ranjhana looked so good together, I was wishing really hard for them to fall madly in love. Don't they look so good together?

And that slightly bemused and lingering look Ranjhana directed at Madhavi as Madhavi walked away. Sitting on Aditya's lap, she only had eyes for Madhavi ... Yeah, I'd watch the hell out of such a twist in the tale. (Maybe for the third installment? I mean, I'd think Aditya would've been put away for at least a few years, and Madhavi seemed to have stepped into his shoes — politically — at the end of Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster Returns so why would she not take over his role as Ranjhana's spouse?)

Type-e-Ishq Redux: मिल गयी!

Saw Bhumika DVDs in Mustafa's last Friday and I knew for certain that the Daawat-e-Ishq title typeface isn't a custom-designed one ...

So I ran a quick Google search and found Benguiat Caslon:

My god, I think I have a crush on it. It's so sexy and beautiful!

Aww

Even though I was in Little India yesterday (with Geeta, at our regular, eating our regular) and visited Mustafa, I didn't buy any DVDs — I couldn't find A Wednesday! and couldn't think of what else to buy — which felt weird. Weird because it's become a habit for me to savor my new DVDs as I have my lunch after Sunday aerial yoga class. It's such a treat.

So I was completely lost today because I didn't know what to watch.

Finally settled on Daawat-e-Ishq (streamed, thank you anonymous uploader) which I'd been meaning to buy ... except I realize I make very poor choices when it comes to rom-com, resulting in my buying things like Yeh Jaawani Hai Deewani, Love Aaj Kal, and Teri Meri Kahani (I have still yet to unwrap the former two).

But Daawat-e-Ishq: awww. It' so sweet! I wonder why it's a flop at the box office. Is it the somewhat preachy tone at the start of the movie, or the slightly weak ending? Parineeti and Aditya Roy Kapur are so cute together, but then again Pari looks great with all her male co-stars so far (unlike Ileana d'Cruz whom I've found to not look compatible with any of her male co-stars in the two and a half movies I've watched of hers: Barfi!, Main Tera Hero, and Happy Ending).

For a movie with younger actors, I was surprised there was no kiss. I found the lack of at least one kiss at the denouement a little odd. Surely after saving each other from thugs, apologizing, forgiving, confessing your true love's passion, and finding your love reciprocated, a kiss wouldn't be amiss? (Does Aditya have a no-kiss clause? 'Cuz Pari definitely doesn't.)

Daawat-e-Ishq has a decent story — better than Main Tera Hero or SO-fucking-TY — and a likable and wholly competent main cast. The music is also decent, and, hello, FOOD PORN. On top of all that, it's at least a little educational, no? Teaching women about section 498A, letting everybody know women are fucking trash that can only be accepted if money is given, nor are men chattel to be auctioned off to the highest offer.

Hell yeah I'm definitely buying this the next time I'm at Mustafa!

(The word daawat is also the name of one of my favorite Indian eating places in Welly. One year, my girl friends arranged a surprise birthday dinner for me there and gifted me a gorgeous bag from Trade Aid with pretty embroidery and Rajasthani mirror work. So, yeah, I guess the word daawat has only very positive connotations for me.)

Weekend of Female Vengeance

One of my favorite genre of movies is the one where a wronged woman gets her revenge, served cold but deliciously punchy. For that reason, I only rewatch Ek Hasina Thi when Urmila's character starts toughening up, first by beating the shit out of her bully; then by fucking Karan over until she leaves him to the rats.

It's not really the schadenfreude I enjoy; it's watching women beating the ever-loving shit of out their attackers or whoever wronged them, get their revenge.

Yesterday, I finally saw Kahaani (which I bought on Friday). I'd put off watching it because I'd read the Wiki synopsis (spoilers and all), so I'd thought I'd not find the movie engaging. Boy, was I ever wrong ... (I only bought the DVD because I wanted to see Nawazuddin Siddiqui in a movie in which he has at least a supporting role; the kinda films in which he has a leading role are usually not my cuppa).

In fact, I found it very engrossing (despite Wiki's spoilers). Vidya Balan is just phenomenal in it. The three best things about Kahaani are: Vidya Balan, Nawaz (who was scary-intense; to watch Vidya calmly asserted herself, throwing his arrogant words back at him, was sweet as), and the sweet, shy Rana's crush on Vidya. My favorite scene is the rise of Durga in Vidya. The moment she opened her eyes and directed at Milan Damji a stare that burned with a thousand fires ...

... then proceeded to kick his fucking ass to hell. Yeah, asshole, you're fucking roadkill. That was when I tumbled over from mere admiration into devout worship of Vidya.

I mean, she stabbed him — twice! — with a fucking pencil. Who does that?! I love watching women kick ass, and Vidya did so with particular style. (That is prolly the scene I'll keep rewatching in days to come! I've already rewatched the entire film once today!)

And thank you for the sweet, sweet irony of a contract killer with a life insurance agent cover! Bob Biswas's unholy crossing of himself (with throat-slash motion) was also quite inspired. (The one aspect Kahaani failed in was everything that has do with computers and 'hacking' — couldn've been done better. Did the writers/director not have a consultant for this?)

So, after rewatching Kahaani today, after my Nautanki Saala (just bought on Friday, with Kahaani) failed to work, and I'd thrown a fit, I went in search of something that isn't an insipid love story ... Found Mardaani.

Mardaani I also avoided watching (even though I adore Rani Mukherji and read good reviews of the film) because I can't stand watching children get sex-trafficked and harmed in any way. But, today, watched it I did.

I like Rani in it; the film, on the other hand, is still a little too masala for the direction it tried to go. It was a little hard for me to completely believe Rani's character was able to physically kick ass because her face is so sweet and innocent. (By god, they gave her bangs and long hair for this — what?! Look, I'm not expected the tough-woman pixie cut nor G.I. Jane's crew cut, but bangs?! An easily grabbed long plait/ponytail?! The fuck ...)

But kick ass she did — and, by that part of the movie, I enjoyed the hell out of it (and also the fact that she wasn't afraid to hit below the belt). And hell yeah I enjoyed the girls venting their collective fury on the shithead. It was, for that moment, extremely cathartic (for me).

Because movies are vicarious for viewers, no?

WOW

Last night, YouTube recommended that I watch the trailer of Margarita, With A Straw. Wow. How is it that I still haven't seen anything with Kalki Koechlin in it? Well, except for AIB's 'It's Your Fault' clip:

After the trailer I watched two or three interviews in which Kalki spoke French, English, Tamil, and Hindi. WOW. I'm fascinated by people who speak/write/read in multiple languages. Stephen Fry was the first person I got to know about (after reading The Liar at 14) who knew more than two languages. Trefusis initially inspired me to pursue linguistics (which I did by majoring in it at varsity, but when I eventually did my Honors, it was in Medieval Studies — like Old Norse, Old English, Middle English, and Stylistics).

Anyway, the point is, I'm in awe of people who know more than two languages. I'm supposed to bilingual but I can barely read in my mother tongue and can't code-switch to order. Kalki Koechlin is completely amazing to me — know four languages, a good actor, a social activist ... In fact, maybe That Girl In Yellow Boots will go on my to-watch list now (holy shit she co-wrote it!). I might even go through and follow her entire filmography (which will be a real challenge since she does many films I won't usually watch in case they bring me down).

And this is a really interesting clip about her thoughts on her identity. I was a little confounded (and dumbfounded too) when I first read that she is of French descent, Indian-born and raised, and, again, SPEAKS SO MANY LANGUAGES!

(I agree: I only scribble seriously when I'm in the downward spiral and/or unemployed.)

Margarita, With A Straw looks wonderful, and although I worry it'll make me cry, I'm pretty sure there's humor enough to make me smile again ...

Ishqiya + Dedh Ishqiya = Fuck Yeah!

I finally watched Ishqiya AND Dedh Ishqiya — FUCKING AWESOME AFTERNOON!

I think Dedh Ishqiya is funnier than first; it also has Vijay Raaz and his beautiful hair in it. No, seriously, his hair is almost as beautiful as Huma Qureshi. Almost. Also, Dedh Ishqiya has LESBIANS.

Wait.

No.

No, it has my crush, Huma Qureshi, playing one half of an utterly gorgeous lesbian couple!!!

The more fitting #ohdekho #dekho #dekho

And not in that stupid exploitative way like Girlfriend.

What I don't like in both films is the violence against women. I can't stand seeing violence against animals, women, and children, not even fake violence; I want to kill the assholes dead who hurt them.

I also don't get why Khalujaan and Babban still seem to think they have a chance with Para and Muniya towards the end of the movie (bail scene), despite seeing Para and Muniya get it on (while the men were tied up), despite Khalujaan having seemingly conceded the lesbian relationship that the two women have (see: the lihaaf reference). Is it just to reinforce how much those two male characters are complete fools for love and eternal optimists?

Anyway, I love big ol' lesbian happy endings! (This Rediff article is a good read and also elucidates Dedh Ishqiya's significance in modern Indian film history.)

I feel quite sorry for the Jaan Mohammad character — I believe it's more his obsessive love for Begum Para than his desperate coveting of the Nawab title that fueled his determination to marry her — but only because of Vijay Raaz's beautiful hair (which also looked very pretty in Delhi Belly). I wish my hair could be wavy/curly that way, instead of looking like a windswept mess all the time, wind notwithstanding.

Chand Ka Tukda

The first time I saw Sonakshi Sinha's face (prolly a still from Lootera I reckon — can't really recall), she reminded me of Madhubala in Mughal-e-Azam at the moment Anarkali lifted her veil:

I know they don't look alike (do they?) and I don't quite know why Sonakshi's face reminded me of Madhubala, but it was the first time I felt I understood what it meant to describe a woman's face as a piece of moon (ugh, how clunky it sounds in English). There's nothing more luminous, more breathtaking, more exquisite.

Look at her! Just look. Her face is one that poets compose poetry and lyrics in praise of!

I think she'll look completely at home in a period drama involving courtesans (I haven't seen any of her films though so I really hope she can act at least half as well as she is beautiful) — maybe another remake of Umrao Jaan? (They've ruined it enough by casting the beauty queen in the 2006 remake anyway.) BUT LEAVE PAKEEZAH THE FUCK ALONE. There is only one Pakeezah, only one Meena Kumari.

Speaking of Meena Kumari, look at the beaut of a compilation showing up on my YouTube feed — it's fucking gorgeous and the perfect way to end the work week!

Inaccessible

The best sort of crush is a crush on someone completely inaccessible to you. It's less painful because you know it's impossible to ever hook up with the one who, in having, will make long hours short (according to the Bard).

That's sooooo much better than pining over someone who passes by you in the corridors so closely you can smell her shampoo, or - worse - someone you hang out with all the time, making her laugh and dreaming of her laughter.

Moar crushes for me, plz!

My People

I only truly and fully get the awesomeness that is Tumblr when I have a crush on some unattainable figure ... like Sue Perkins.

Tumblr gave me this:

from SuePerkinsSuperstar

And many many many more gifs and imgs of Sue Perkins and Sue and Mel.

Oh yeah. Tumblr, you mah people.