14:08 - went a little overboard buying food for lunch. I got: three pieces of salmon-and-avocado sushi and salmon sashimi from Mi Sushi, and two chicken wings and chips from Cozy Cake Shop. Made a green tea to wash down the grease. The Runs then reared its disgusting head a few more times.
Around 21:00 - had a banana after dance, eating it as I walked home. Didn't feel hungry, but I didn't want to get a cramp in my feet or suddenly feel like keeling over.
23:01 - after I showered, I finally felt a little hungry. What was immediately available were the wings left from lunch, a coffee-flavored mochi which has been sitting in the fridge since Goddess-knows-when, and a green tea. I didn't have an orange tonight because I kept craving savory stuff.
Ugh. I hate having The Runs. I feel lethargic the entire day, and didn't do much at pole (not having the strength or enthusiasm), and was more or less a zombie at dance.
My supervisor asked today if I might be interested in pursuing a post-grad in literary linguistics. Knowing I'd completed my honors degree, she said I could go on to do a Ph.D. and skip the Master's degree, and: "... if you are interested, we can apply for a scholarship for you ..." Not quite sure who 'we' refers to, but it's a nice gesture; I'm just not quite sure I'm ready to buckle down and 'study' more, especially for a Ph.D. Gah - how many more years?
Maybe what she was hinting was that my thesis could tie in with this Ling-Psyc (not psycholinguistics though) research project. Well, I don't think that'll be too bad - I actually find it quite interesting. It's just - well, is it interesting enough for me to spend the next few years bashing my thick skull against the wall?
It's a complete irony, of course. Back in 2005, if you'd offered me such a deal - sweetened by the lure of a (hopefully full) scholarship - I'd've jumped at it and prolly promised to give my first-born in exchange for it. But, you know, after having worked for a bit (doing mindless, brain-lite work, for both an incompetent boss and for who might've been the Devil himself), I've become lazy and don't quite fancy having to apply myself again.
4 comments:
well, wld u rather come home?
i'm sure there are more choices than 1) stay and do my post-grad, and 2) go home.
in any case, i really can't afford to do my post-grad should i be so inclined.
but say if you had to choose between the 2.
that would be a false restriction, and wrong to impose it on myself.
always keep your eyes open for options and alternatives.
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