The sound of you sleeping

It was a sleepy afternoon until you sent me those texts ...

After which, I was wide awake - but unable to concentrate on my work, because even though I was staring at my spreadsheets, I was fantasizing about ... Stuff. ;)

:::

On a more sombre note: Requiescat in pace, Del Martin.

I'm really glad she and her partner were able to marry. Again.

.

The sound of you sleeping

... but you're sleeping so silently ... =(

Color me nonplussed. Jen and Jit planned a night out at a lesbian bar.

(Wait, wha-? Right?)

And Jen even found this. The article made me giggle so much I almost forgot to roll my eyes at the epitome of lesbian hair (Shane's famed mane in season 2 was so dorky) - I mean, why couldn't it be Alice's or Jenny's (in season 2) or Marina's hair? I love Alice's funky 'dos; and - hello? - did nobody notice what Marina can do with a scarf? (I like Lara's hair too - yeah, okay, I love red hair ...)

Sigh. Okay, off to bed or get really fucked tomorrow.

(Boss already called me "catty" today =( ... I'm bitchy, not catty.)

Dinah Washington - 'Is You Is Or Is You Ain't My Baby' (Rae & Christian remix)

Album: Verve Remixed



Every time I hear the opening beats of this track, I gird my loins (figuratively and literally) for some 5 minutes' worth of crunches ... Because that's how we've been starting pole class for weeks now. (Paging Dr. Pavlov.)

Skipped exotic class today because - egads! - I forgot to bring my shoes. This has never happened - evar - except in my dreams. And, by gawd, I only realized I'd forgotten when it was close to noon.

Must. Go. For. Pole. Tomorrow.

K's Choice - 'I'm Not An Addict'

Album: Paradise In Me



Actually, I'd lost some skin to the burns after all ... Sigh.

Saw the doc tonight and asked him (by-the-way) to measure my hemoglobin count - I'm up 1.0 g/dL from my last blood test (about 8 months ago), but still below the average of 12.0 g/dL for females. Can't stop taking the folic acid evar, said the doc ... Sigh.

Also weighed myself while in the doc's waiting room - I've put on 4 kgs since last year! ... Sigh.

But now I got pills (for the flu) that'll put me to sleep at night (hopefully) ... Yay!

The sound of you sleeping

It's been raining the whole weekend (how awesome?) and it feels like year-end already. I must've caught some bug again because my head feels like it's about explode - again.

But I'm so glad you're home, baby.

Midge Ure - 'Breathe'

Album: Breathe



I crave coffee - the smell, the taste. Had to have one (a kopi peng) after pole prac today, and it was a strong one, so now, even though I'm yawning, I can't sleep.

And I feel hungry even though I had leftover noodles (from lunch) around two hours ago.

I want some insane all-out dance night ... But now I'm too embarrassed by the way I dance to do it in public. With a guy.

Sigh.

I think I'm ready to crash.

My upper body aches badly, especially the right side of (the back of) my ribs. I'm 50% sure it's the muscles in the area that hurt, not the ribs themselves. I'm also having twinges in my left elbow, which is driving me nuts because every time I have a twinge, it affects my ability to use that arm.

All that aside, I'm thinking of taking up pilates because I couldn't find any contortionist classes here. Also, if I could find aerial silk classes, I'm there.

The sound of you sleeping

I miss you, baby.

So tired ... and my right side hurts.

I figured out what's wrong with my shoulder mount (video-taping helps), but ... I still have a long way to go to get there. My core muscles are abysmal.

I don't want to think tonight ...

Ruthie Henshall - 'I Dreamed A Dream'

Album: Les Misérables 10^th Anniversary Concert



I think I need Mephisto around, physically. He serves as a reminder and will keep me on track, otherwise I forget, get sidetracked, lose track, and get stressed and scared just thinking - what he called "chasing your own tail [until] you get sucked up your ass".

Managed a headstand yesterday, and a handstand today - things I couldn't do as a nubile teen (including splits), I'm doing it as an old woman. "You're still very young," is what those men tell me; then again, they each have at least half a decade of experience, of course I'm still "very young" to them.

"Very young" - and feckless, I think.

Lea Salonga - 'On My Own'

Album: Les Misérables 10^th Anniversary Concert



I've been thinking a lot of Philip Larkin's 'This Be The Verse', especially when it comes to my boss, and since Saturday.

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.

Read it when I was 12, and it'd stuck with me through the years. Can't be more true.

The sound of you sleeping

Still feeling a little disassociated, yet am indubitably affected by last night's events.

The next time Mephisto talks about my 'boyfriend', I'm going to set things straight. I only hope it doesn't come back to bite me in the ass somehow.

As I've said before, that bunch of ol' boys gossip like the best of fishwives - if not better.

The sound of you sleeping

I wish you or Rach could give me a hug tonight.

I'm beginning to feel violated and a little grimy. I don't like being touched by strange men, and I don't like talking about things I don't want to talk about.

In the shuttle, as we turned into Clarke Quay, a voice in my head told me I was going to lose my 'innocence' - naivety, if you will, about the real world - tonight, and it was right.

My fault for not being able to say no, and my accursed sense of responsibility; I walked into it with eyes wide open.

I just gotta suck it up. Suck it up.

Anna Netrebko - 'Follie! ... follie! ... Sempre libera'

Album: Verdi: La Traviata



I'm in the office now, alone and bored. I've been here since 08:15 and the meeting has since ended, with everybody waiting in line to have a one-on-one meeting with my boss and the head honcho.

If only time were malleable: I'd shorten it until my pole class, whereupon I'd stretched it out as long as I possibly could, and then shorten it for the dinner I had to attend, until I could get home and collapse in bed.

Sigh.

Nice to be able to blast arias in the office though.