The doc - a very pretty and young thing - said the numbness has nothing to do with my lower-back (something I'd've known had I bothered to google it), but might be attributed to a low B12 and/or folate(?) level in my blood. Or something. So I've to go get my blood tested again. Sigh.

Then she recommended I go to the physiotherapist to have my lower-back ache checked out. Luckily for me, there were available time-slots when I went to make an appointment, so I saw the first physiotherapist I've ever seen in my entire life yesterday.

He had clammy hands (yucks), and told me I have very poor range in bending backwards. So there's an exercise I need to be doing (10 sets of 6 reps daily) to loosen up that specific muscle. And I'm due back next Tue, hopefully with some improvement (if I faithfully do the exercise like I'm supposed to).

Honestly, the possibility of a more flexible back is exciting me. I want to be able to touch my toes to my ears again!

Well. Finally made an appointment to see a doctor at Student Health.

... but I feel a little better now, really. Except for the fatigue. Or maybe it's just lack of sleep. Tiredness. We'll need to sleep earlier.

My dad will be dropping in for the next two days. Where to go, what to see? Welly's so boring. Sigh.

Health-wise, this has been one fucking crappy week. Yes, I'm convinced there's something wrong (but, again, I am a bit of a hypochondriac). I'm making an appointment to see the doc next week, after my period ends (started on Friday), and because my lower back pain always escalates during my period, I'll wait to see if all (or most) of my problems would disappear once my period ends.

Today, I've a tight chest (which I suspect is caffeine-induced) - and still do - and the vague numbness has migrated from my left little finger to my right upper arm. In addition, both arms suffer from twinges despite the fact that I'd skipped my silks class yesterday; am also feeling light-headed, but I suspect it's my blood loss.

Growing old really sucks balls. Seriously.

Gotta go home and see my doc. And, one of the first things I'm going to do when I get back home will be to see Desmond about removing that microdermal. I think I'm past the piercings (but not the ink).

Looping Handel's 'Lascia ch'io pianga' (from Farinelli OST) and 'Ombra mai fu' (from Cecilia Bartoli's Sacrificium; free download available at NPR). Lovely.

So. By the time I finished up the draft of one part of my research essay, it was about 02:30. I tossed and turned in bed til about 03:00 then finally gave in and popped an Actifed (it's a drowsy formula).

I set my alarm for 08:30 because I had to see my supervisor at 10:30 this morning, but I woke all on my own at 06:57.

God. What's wrong?

Took a quick stock of my life as I was in the shower, and I realized I haven't been pain-free ... since 2004. (And by 'pain' I meant lower back pain.) How could I have spent 5 years in pain and ... not realized it? I mean, I am cognizant of the pain, every waking moment - and some days are worse than others - but because I still do the stuff I want to do, whether I am in pain or not, I've learned to relegate it to the periphery of my consciousness; it's become the niggling ache I can - at best - ignore.

That's just not done. Not anymore.

I'm going home. And once I'm home, I'm going to my doctor's and ask silly little questions (which I'll now google about) about my back and all my joints.

Right now, I'll work on cutting down on my sugar intake (which will be tough, because I've been mainlining sugar since I was in pigstails) because I think it might be interferring with my ability to concentrate. (I'm guessing it's sugar as a second choice; my first would be just plain disinterest.)

I'm going to take up pilates to work on my core muscles in the hope that a stronger core will take the stress - and therefore pain - off my lower back.

Also, I've been thinking lately of taking up jazz. Again. If I do start jazz (again), I'll make bloody sure to stick with it this time.

Had my ME exam yesterday. Boy did I tank, but man am I glad to be done with that. I'd been indirectly stressed out by it the whole of last week - mainly because I knew I should be studying but couldn't be arsed which guilt-tripped me heavily. Since I've been watching House lately, I wondered last night as to the purpose of guilt: what is the purpose of guilt?

I'd been studying here and there, but yesterday, before my paper, I found an interesting debate which I just had to see in full before I headed out, the motion being: The Catholic Church is a force for good in the world.


(The rest of the debate here.)

It is, I feel, a skewed debate as one side has more intelligence than the other. (Also: ANSWER THE GODDAMN QUESTIONS, DAMNIT! Don't squirm and deflect and pretend ignorance in order not to answer questions you don't like. I can see the squirming despite the glare of light off your thick, thick chain and big, big ring.)

Disclaimer: I <3 Stephen Fry; I've been looking up to him (metaphorically) since I was 16, and should I ever meet him in person ... I'll still be looking up to him (literally).