=( Torn.



I miss my Auntie Al.

The Frames - 'Star Star (Pure Imagination)'

Album: Set List



I know I've been avoiding things - and people - recently (reverting to form prolly) but I'm not quite sure why; things and people being mostly completely different matters.

With regards to the things, as far as I can see it, I'm procrastinating (again).

Why is the first step always so hard?

(Also, for pole, I find myself not daring to do stuff, and thinking myself unable to do stuff - more proof I'm reverting to form?)

=( Am back in my bottomless well of misery.

The sound of you sleeping

I have to say, as I near the end of Another Mother Tongue, I feel myself very much seduced by Grahn's theories and conjectures. Skepticism notwithstanding, I just want to believe it's all true, even if - or especially because - it's too good to be all true.

Wishful thinking ... or thoughtful wish.

The sound of you sleeping

I've just noticed the curious parallel tonight: That is, whenever my Dad is away on a business trip, he and my mother will exchange phone calls - without fail - every day/night he is away; and how you and I are doing almost the same ... except, unlike my mother, I have the happy chance that I sometimes might wake up to you in my ear.

The sound of you sleeping

Do my eyes deceive me? I spotted today in the local papers' movie screenings section a screening of Wilde. Is it a repeat screening? I don't recall seeing it in the papers when it first came out (1997) ... then again, I was a feckless teen, too absorbed with the angst of self-identity, so what do I know, eh?

Have decided to attend Wed's pole prac as faithfully as I could. One, 'cuz pole still tops salsa in my world; and, two, 'cuz I'm just a horrid salsa novice who can't for the life of her follow.

People I don't know well and don't consider friends - in the narrowest and most traditional of senses - shouldn't be sending me strange texts and inviting me to engagement parties.

I just feel weirded out by it all.

Pole was good. I've missed that.

Twenty minutes more and I can officially go home, and it's the weekend. Which means I have pole tomorrow (whee!) and can wake up in the afternoon.

And I just can't fucking wait.

I get it now. It's always better to have something to look forward to than nothing (even when the going's great).

The sound of you sleeping

Friday ... and then, pole.

It'll be the first proper pole class for more than a month. I'm looking forward so much to it, I'm scared I'll jinx it. =(

The Frames - 'Star Star (Pure Imagination)'

Album: Set List



Sitting alone in the train station, I felt incredibly frustrated with myself. I'm so exhausted I shouldn't have lingered after dinner for dessert; I should've excused myself and gone straight home.

But I didn't.

Which was why, at 23:08, I was waiting alone in the train station: Because I didn't say 'no' when I should've; because there was no way of getting home quickly (no cabs in sight).

Which is why, at 00:55, I'm awake waiting for my hair to dry, when I should be asleep - because I need the sleep, damnit.

I'm so tired I feel like I'm about to crash - I suspect it's just a matter of time too. There's a headache lurking in the front of my skull.

I haven't had a good and proper rest since before I went on my little vacation - and certainly not during that vacation.

Can't wait 'til the weekend comes. Will have to get through tonight (salsa, and one gathering for which I'd've to skip pole prac). And tomorrow. And Friday.

Sigh. I'm really, really, really tired.

Glen Hansard & Markéta Irglová - 'Once'

Album: Once OST



It's a simple joy, walking my dog - realized it tonight. The small, everyday things always end up being big things when they disappear.

I think I've been chasing my tail (as Mephisto once put it) and has gotten sucked up my ass. And I'm stuck ...

Art & Lies currently on hold as I devour Judy Grahn's Another Mother Tongue (rather interesting, even if I read with much skepticism), found in Chiang Mai's airport for just THB 199.

It's amazing what you can find at the least expected of places.

Just as I'm two inches from sleeping on the job (yes, I'm that close), I get told I'll be helping to administer our data system. Guess I'll have more abbreviations to memorize and add to my vocabulary (temporarily).

Oh. Joy.

The quiz results aren't happy: It appears that I have Stage 2 Adultitis.

=(

Glen Hansard & Markéta Irglová - 'Fallen From The Sky'

Album: Once OST



Back in Singapore - skin a little burnt, face a complete wreck, and hair utterly ruined - and back to work tomorrow. (I'm nervous about going back to work and seeing Mephisto.)

This week on, I'll be back on my regular dance schedule of five classes a week: stylings, Intermediate 2 salsa, jazz (prolly should stop skipping classes), and pole 3A.

Hm.