Day #22

This week is ... ugh. Yesterday I actually opened one of three packets of cookies I have in the office — one of the two packets of the ToffeePops. That's when I know I'm not dealing with this week well. I offered Debby some but she said she's on a diet. We got to chatting and she told me her new tattoo idea and recommended that I think about my next one (instead of ruining my body with crappy over-processed snacks).

But I'm out of ideas. My brain is exhausted. And my patterns are like petering out, just one per day lately. But, to be fair, it does take quite a bit of time to finish one, even if it's only an A6-sized sheet of paper.

Day #21

Every hour that I'm at work, I can't stand it, want to sabotage myself. Because fuck all these last minute shit. Seriously. They should all go fuck themselves and burn in the stinky hell fire.

Last minute. Because nobody's time bloody matters, not the least a lowly minion.

Day #20

So tired after two classes today I decided to skip aerials class. Sigh. Yes, only two classes (four hours and around 70 kids in total) and I'm beat. Teenagers are so draining ...

Added a little more stuff to yesterday's pattern and did a small (A6) one for today. Pftttt.

I think I finally did it — memorized the entire balcony scene in Romeo & Juliet (Oxford World's Classics, 2000). I decided to do it after watching Baz Luhrmann's Romeo + Juliet in 1997 (or thereabouts). For the longest time, the bit after "But to be frank and give it thee again ..." eluded me; then, last week, I could suddenly regurgitate most of it. So, yay ... I guess?

Day #19

I think I have this 30 Days of Patterns thing to thank for my noticing patterns every day and everywhere, whether it's the pavement, or someone's dress, or laptop sleeve, or the wall ..., etc. But I suppose, ultimately, I have Emily to thank for the patterns thing. I don't think I'd been into patterns so much before; also, Naïve: Modernism and Folklore in Contemporary Graphic Design is just so, so, so awesome.

This one I started last night after posting the two I did but I still didn't manage to finish it tonight. And it's only an A5 sheet! I'll try to finish it tomorrow night, after tomorrow's pattern, if possible.

Day #18

Ever woke up thinking you've had hell lotta dreams only to not remembering any of it? (Well, okay, maybe I remember trying real hard to look for a hospital or something ... for a job interview or whatever, not a medical emergency.)

Started the day Skyping with Rach, just to catch up a little, which was really nice. It's hilarious how whenever the camera was turned on, we both thought we were looking at ourselves only to realized it was each other we were looking at! The thing is, we don't even look alike!

Anyway. Just two today. Between prepping and cooking this week's lunches and going out to buy a food processor (yay! Finally got one! My frozen banana slices could be turned into a vegan soft serve soon!), two were all I could do. Still fascinated by henna tattoo motifs ...

Day #17

Some kid waved his hand in front of my face as I was waiting for the elevator today. Turned out that he was in a workshop I ran for his class. It didn't freak me out nor was it awkward, but I still wish my job would let me be less visible.

Still trying to figure out henna tattoo motifs and designs.

Day #16

What a lovely night with the kitties! Christopher was already waiting for me at the park and jogged briskly over as soon as he spotted me. Poor little dude, he must be hungry. Sam and Obie were up to their usual antics — lotsa chasing and prancing around. On my way home, Fernando (who could've been the inspiration for Bustopher Jones) was lounging by the kerb, a couple doors down from his home. He actually ran to me. (Well, ran as quickly and well as a really fat cat could ...) Poor Fernando, he must be so lonely after Muumuu died. He was so affectionate tonight when he is usually quite shy and scaredy.

So I spent more time with the kitties than I did effort with this pattern. If it could even be called a pattern ...

I was looking at henna tattoo designs but I couldn't seem to master the motifs.

Day #15

And, quite suddenly, I don't seem to be on downtime anymore. I can't figure it out — what brings about downtime and what did exactly did I do (or not do) to make the downtime fade away?

Anyway. This one's A5 and it took quite awhile I must say. Only because I kept getting stumped as to what other patterns I could put in.

The manager presented the proposed blueprints for the renovations. Note to self: You gotta fucking leave before the renovation commences.

Anywhere but here.

Day #14

Terms & Conditions is great. It's funny and yet has lines that have such gravitas (to me, at least) and, at times, even quite perfectly describe the ... insides. Like:

... it transpired that my happiness was nitroglycerin. Clear and stable as long as everything was utterly calm. But shake it just a bit — and it exploded.

Anyway. Another quote tonight which I thought was both discomfitingly hilarious and miserably true:

Day #13

Tonight, I sacrificed the kitties (as in not going into the park and be That Crazy Cat Lady^TM). Cuz I felt I wanted — needed — to do this:

And it continues: "If you only feed it solitude and fear, one day it will give up on you." (From my next Read of the Month, Terms & Conditions by Robert Glancy, which I started reading today.)

Day #12

I woke remembering the last vestiges of a dream in which I was trying to get to Berhampore (Wellington, not Bengal) in a horrid lightning storm (it was raining and thundering this dawn). Strange. Wonder what brought that on? I've no connection to Berhampore — except, maybe, vaguely (Shirley now lives there).

Anyway. I think the Kuching trip is on. I was looking forward to it ... until anxiety kicked in. Sigh.

Day #11

Yeah, patterns ... instead I did what I've been thinking of trying out for the past week — see what I could do with hand-writing something for Hazel's cutting.

So: Shakespeare, Rumi, and Blake — all appropriate (if pedestrian) for weddings, I guess?

Hand-writing is really not something I do well at all, and I was never into calligraphy. Jess does it so well though ...

Sigh. Wish I had a clearer and executable plan for that cutting.

Day #10

I nodded off not long after dinner last night — completely knackered. Man, it was only a three-day work week but it was a fucking long one. I think I'm nearly back in the same emotional, physical, and psychological state as I was when I worked in the viper pit. Yes, it's actually very nearly that time.

Or maybe I just need a break?

Two today. Bought a new marker and tested it. Ugh. It bleeds like a Sharpie.

Read of the month: The Fourth Bear by Jasper Fforde.

Day #9

Just a small one tonight. Started off okay but finished terrible.

I bought a black 0.5mm pen today and graph paper because I thought I might want to try letters. Maybe this weekend.

Still sad. Prolly the full moon. Sad and fatigued.