Bishop Allen - 'Things Are What You Make Of Them'

Album: Charm School



You know, it's only 3^rd March, but I think I've been to the doc's more times in this year alone than I had the last two years combined.

Point: When I stepped into the doc's this evening, the receptionist (a new one) recognized me and called me by my first name.

Badtimingytis strikes again - in the form of a relapsed prolapsed disc this time, my fourth since 2003. Fingers crossed the next '-lapsed' wouldn't be collapsed.

FUCK.

The Shins - 'Caring is Creepy'

Album: Oh, Inverted World



"I've always wished I had an older brother," I said.

"You want to be taken care of." Not a question; a statement.

I thought about it. "Yeah ... I just want someone who'd take care of me, be on my side, make sure I don't get bullied and all that, you know?"

And I have to wonder if that would be so wrong, to want that.

Jamie Lidell ft. Jose Gonzales - 'Multiply (In A Minor Key)'

Album: Multiply Additions



I feel like there's so much in my head it's gonna explode - but ... no. It's just one thing. One. Fucking Thing. I don't know why or how I'd let it grown so huge it's become a full-blown obsession I can't get it out of my fucking head.

And the cherry on top of this is - I shouldn't be obsessing over it at all. I've something else I need to focus on.



Was sitting on the couch just now and had a great big sneeze that completely threw my lower back. FUCK.

FUCK.

Rach defined a relationship as something you invest time and money in: Food for thought for me there.

I made Praveen walk to the Gallery Hotel with me and we found a nice hangout spot there; eM, I think it's called (or something). Lovely night out.

I wish I had a super power (yes, I've been power-watching Heroes seasons one and two).

Oh no ...

I need a hug - no, I need hugs tonight.

=(

I think ... at the end of the day, at the end of it all - the root of it is: I'm frustrated.

I think I'm frustrated because time is not moving fast enough, while simultaneously moving too fast, and I'm wasting it when I could be doing some with it, with myself, with my life.

There's gotta be more to life than what I'm making of it now, and I would make all the necessary changes too to get the most out of what I could have - if only I knew what sort of changes ...

Tracy Chapman - 'Give Me One Reason'

Album: New Beginning

Something I figured out in the shower: Even with people you trust and confide in, you have to make sure they hold the same things sacred as you do; otherwise, they will inevitably blurt out something you told them in complete confidence - or so you thought.

It's nobody's fault, I suppose - things just happen.

That being said, I'm back to square one: Ultimately, if you don't want it known, then you shouldn't be telling it to the living.

Doing nothing is so tiring.

Jesus, I gotta snap out of it soon. It's really not "those girls" I think I couldn't, wouldn't trust; it's actually just me, myself.

Peaches - 'I U She'

Album: Fatherfucker



Shit. I feel like a real asshole whenever this happens.

Nine Inch Nails - 'Closer'

Album: Downward Spiral



Wow, it's been a long time since I drank and dirty danced ... and got horny. And to think all I really wanted for this evening was dinner and coffee and dessert at some place quiet.



I blame it on the moon.

Orange And Lemons - 'Let Me'

Album: Moonlane Gardens



Realized today I don't feel like going out on Saturday with Rach only because I don't want to meet new guys (her friends); girls I wouldn't have minded though.

Fuck. If I kept this up, I'd soon be moving among females-only circles - and intellectually, I don't want that to happen.



I feel like such a sap sometimes.

Takako Minakawa - 'Fantastic Cat'

Album: Recubed



Lovely pole prac by my lonesome - I nailed two variations (as demonstrated - albeit, of course, in a whole lot more graceful and effortless manner- by one of my favorite pole girls on youtube ) of an invert!

But then during salsa, I was completely lost doing the basic left turn ... =|

Louis Jordan - 'I Know What I've Got'

Album: Five Guys Named Moe



Man ... I've missed pole practice. It's the only time I am intently focused on something that I consider constructive.

The only other time I'm half as focused is when I play Zuma or Bejeweled - in the office.

(Yes, I'm truly stupid, and getting stupider by the second.)

But, after pole prac, when it's late and I'm tired, man oh man, I miss you so much.